Oblivion is Inevitable

I’m feeling lost today.

As I was browsing the internet earlier this evening, searching for answers on how to find meaning in life and how will I know my life’s purpose, I caught myself reading this article by markmanson.net “7 Strange Questions That Help You Find Your Life Purpose”. I appreciate how he presented the questions and his answers to somehow guide a person like me, who is lost.

The last strange question he asked really hit me hard, If you knew you you were going to die one year from today, what would you do and how would you want to be remembered? Woah! Quite hard to answer, eh? He added, what is your legacy going to be? What are the stories people are going to tell when you’re gone? What is your obituary going to say? Is there anything to say at all? If not, what would you like it to say? How can you start working towards that today?

To tell you guys honestly, I’ve always been dreaming of inspiring the people around me. I want to touch at least, if not all, someone’s life. I want to show the beauty of life despite of its cruelty and chaos. I want to give positive influence to other people, I want to be remembered by someone, if not all. I don’t care what legacy I’m going to have, or the message they’re going to put in obituary. I used to seek love and appreciation from other people. I always give unrequited love to the wrong people. I want to be remembered as the girl who transformed into someone who doesn’t want to be love by everyone anymore, instead she became this person who wants to offer and give love to those who are weak, hopeless and helpless.

I want to give hope and encouragement, especially to the weak and less fortunate. Nowadays, it’s rare to find someone who will be there for you through ups and downs no matter how easy or difficult life is. I want these people to think that they are not alone. That even though life is hard as it is, there will always be someone who will give them courage and support and guidance. I want to be that someone.

I fear oblivion. I’m scared to be forgotten. I want to be remembered. A girl named Gillian.

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